guardians_song (guardians_song) wrote,

Sporker Introductions, Version 2!

(Also, this is a hideous LJ-post editor, and I am beyond thankful that Dreamwidth never changed over.)

Sporkers: Roy-Elbe-Richard team (alternatively: Roy, Elbe, Richard) [OCs]
Roy is a raging pervert who inserts innuendo at every turn, ships non-canon pairings by default*, and suffers from a mild allergy to excess adverbs. He also has a past as a Gary-Stu, though that isn't mentioned so much any more. ...He's also one-quarter dragon. Long story.
*Almost always slash, except for Edward/Alice.
Elbe is the grammar-fanatic of the sporkers - yes, she's the blue font that keeps showing up in various sporkings - and cares a bit more about human decency than most sporkers. Naturally, she's had a few meltdowns after being dragged through Draco Veritas and the opening chapters of Midnight Sun, and now ships Draco Veritas!Ginny/Rose Potter/Bella Swan. (Again, long story.) She's Roy's sister, by the way... not that there's much resemblance.
Richard is the character in my default icon, a reward he got for... ah... suffering through my Suethor days. As a result, he loathes Sues, complains heavily about breaches in Earth Logic, and acts cynical about badfic in general. As side details, he's a practitioner of Dark Magic, and Elbe's boyfriend. Those facts are unrelated.

Sporkers: Nergals and Ninis team (alternatively: Nergals, Ninis) [from Fire Emblem: Rekka no Ken]
Nergal the Sane is a sober, decent soul who will, one thousand years after his current state, wind up as a psychopathic mass-murderer due to mental degeneration from careless use of Dark Magic (after losing his wife and children, surviving a worldwide apocalyptic event, wandering alone for hundreds of years, and... you get the idea). That would be Nergal the Insane.
Ninis, Nergal's wife, is a similarly pleasant soul with tendencies to... speak... like... this, ship slash, and have epic draconic fits of rage when a fic totally abandons all notions of decency and morality. That's probably the trait for which most readers remember her. :P

Sporkers: Tom and Jerry [Pokemon OCs]
Tom is most notable fer th' very thick accent that he's got, if y'know what I mean. He's a second-generation member of Team Rocket with few morals and a tendency to be the nastier one in sporkings.
Jerry predictably acts as the more pleasant half of the sporking duo. She's also a second-generation member of Team Rocket; Tom recruited her with the claim that it was a "self-funding vigilante organization".

Sporkers: Drake and Mary [Pokemon OCs]
Drake was raised in the wild with only a Charmander for company, so he tends to bring up Pokemon, Pokemon battles, and Pokemon behaviors in the wild a lot. Tom and Jerry have a particular grudge against him due to their inability to capture his Charmander. (...Yes, I know that sounds familiar, and given the parents of all involved, it's meant as a canon in-joke.)
Mary Susan Oak is the daughter of Gary Stewart Oak, who's a well-known Pokemon professor by the time her generation rolls around. Like her father, she tends to be arrogant and well-versed in Pokemon knowledge. Just don't call her Mary Sue.

Misc. Sporkers
Thorn is a cheerful pyromaniac. She's not used much, and is only a side character to other sporking teams.

The Lady of the Hollow is a deceased teenaged madwoman who ships Grindeldore, advocates firebombing of badfics, and tends to go nuts for slash. She also occasionally explodes and acts distinctly more disoriented and pleasant-natured for a while... So yes, she is an AU version of exactly who you think she is. (Her tag)
Her friend “Mors” is the deceased sane man (or boy) to her loony behavior. He completely freaks out whenever characters act Too Stupid To Live, on account of traumatically dying in a situation where, if he'd had half the opportunities of Too Stupid To Live protagonists, he and his twin could have gotten out alive and well. (His tag)

Anita Blake, The Tightness And Wetness Between Worlds, is the main character of Laurell K. Hamilton's Anita Blake: Vampire Humper Hunter series. Please refer to lkh_lashouts for further details. Suffice to say that she attempts to suck all male characters into her Doomcrotch... the "bigger" the better. Fortunately, she's repelled by women.
Rose Potter... Well, if you don't know "Rosey", just check out these links, will you?
Tags: my sporkers
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